Taco Pizza! (And my version of Border Patrol)

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Today I am bringing you a super quick, awfully easy, and very filling recipe that I just LOVE and REALLY want you to try because I think you’ll love it also!

However, posting a TexMex recipe wasn’t what got me thinking about border patrol, banana pudding did.

This week I discovered that the entire staff at my nail salon had NEVER TASTED HOMEMADE BANANA PUDDING, despite having lived in Alabama for years! Now while I let y’all recover from that collective gasp of horror, let me comfort you by saying that I righted that horrendous wrong the very next day. I took them a big old mixing bowl filled with banana pudding and they served it as the main course for their lunch. I was s’proud!.

This got me to thinking though, about all of the people who move to the south and don’t have an opportunity to partake of what the south is really about! Enter my version of Border Patrol. You see, I got a plan!

If I’m ever elected President, here’s what we’re gonna do:

Set up a border along the whole of the Mason Dixon line and in all major Southern Airports.

Have border patrol officers, commonly known as “Granny” stationed along the length of the line and working alongside TSA in the airports to identify anyone entering the south who is not “from ’round here”.

Once said folks are identified, they are immediately pulled out of the line and taken outside to a pavilion lined with picnic tables loaded down with what we think of as “reunion food”. There will be:

Ham, fried chicken, mashed potatoes, fried potatoes, three different kinds of deviled eggs (filling piped in egg, filling spooned in egg, and ones topped with paprika!), homemade rolls from Granny, Mama So-and-So, and Auntie Beatrice, green beans, greens, fried okra, sweet potato casserole, fresh fried corn, cornbread, steak and gravy, biscuits with fresh apple butter and preserves, big old pot of pintos, chopped onion (this counts as a side dish!), coconut cake, chocolate pound cake, mandarin orange cake, yellow cake with hard chocolate icing, HOMEMADE BANANA PUDDING, and at LEAST ten different varieties of congealed salads.

Beverages will be sweet tea served from large pickle jars and lemonade served from a barrel and stirred with a stick.

Visitors will then be invited to “fix their plates” where a sweet white haired lady will follow behind them as they do so proclaiming “Git ya some of that, too. You ain’t eatin’ enough! Here, try you some of this. Yer too skinny. ”

They will then sit down with “the folks” who will tell them all about the real depression, how hot cotton picking season is, and why kids these days don’t know how good they got it.

After being encouraged to go back for seconds and thirds, they will be handed several plates covered in foil to take with them in case they get hungry later and an official welcome package containing:

1 Case of moon pies
1 Gallon of Milo’s tea
Six glass bottles of of RC Cola

~sighs~

I think I could make the world a better place, I really do.

Now how about some Taco Pizza? I love this stuff and so does my family, but especially me. So if I ever come visit you, just have one of these puppies sitting on the counter and I’ll sit down happily and be quiet for at least five minutes. Alright, three.

Something important to note about Taco Pizza, it is VERY filling. If your family normally eats two regular pizzas, you’ll be doing good to eat one of these. Take me seriously here. It is VERY filling! (This is a good thing!)

You’ll need: Refried beans, taco seasoning, ground beef (I use about a cup and a half), cheddar cheese, tortilla chips, salsa, and prepared pizza crust.

You can, of course, use your favorite homemade or store bought crust. I like this particular kind.

If you live in my town, don’t go to Wal Mart, Publix, or Hometown Grocery looking for these. Head right to Piggly Wiggly. I know this because I visited all of the above in that order – with a whiney, nap deprived four year old in tow. I know you think you saw them at Publix but you didn’t. The ones at Publix aren’t the deep dish ones like I like. Trust me, only at Piggly Wiggly. They are in the refrigerated section kinda near the biscuits and such. Besides, we like Piggly Wiggly. The folks in their pharmacy are always so nice and Katy enjoys conning them out of extra suckers. Oh, thats a lollipop for those of you who might not know.

If you make a homemade crust or use any other kind, it needs to be cooked before you add the pizza filling and such to it. So go ahead and cook it now. 🙂

Aren’t I full of helpful advice today?

Place your ground beef and refried beans in a large skillet. My ground beef is already cooked, drained, and sorted in little plastic baggies in my freezer so this is a cinch to put together.

That makes me sound organized, I know. In reality, let me assure you that I am simply lazy and don’t like to cook ground beef and clean up the mess every time I turn around to make a meal.

Add your salsa

Add taco seasoning.

Stir and cook over medium heat until heated through.

Spread onto pizza crust.

This is a deep dish one. I love these.

Thank you, Piggly Wiggly, for being the only people in my entire town to still carry them!!

MUWAH! MUWAH!!

Top with crushed tortilla chips. I usually get a bag of these (my kids love them) and let the kids eat on them a day or two before I make this pizza, then there are tons of crushed ones at the bottom of the bag. hehe.